We Must Leave the Things We Love

I better do this now.
I overslept. Stayed at my old next door neighbors house till 1:00 a.m. babysitting for her son so he could live another day.
No one gets how hard this motherhood thing is if you don't get to go out and play on a regular basis.
We MUST leave the things we love, in order to return and love them more deeply.
Dang, how hard is that?

My friend J. and his wife W. just adopted not one, but THREE little girls...AT THE SAME TIME. I'm waiting for breaking news that London has erupted in a mass of unexplained whirling electrons, creating a worm hole the size of, of, of, whatever large landmark they have in LONDON y'all. ALL because J. and W. flat out refuse to go out and play. Don't want to traumatize the damn babies, or anything.

Fuck.
I'm sorry, but I can't do this trapped happy mom routine.
I missed a meeting yesterday, because i didn't want to ask for help, didn't want to ask all three of my friends to let Mer hang for a WHOLE HOUR so I could go quiet the dragon.

After my friend got home last night, we agreed she would watch Mer several times a week while I went to a meeting, and on Saturday nights I'd watch her kids no they could live another day.

That, and were gonna see about getting her brother off Methadone.
Wonderful evening all in all.
And yes, it's still raining.   

Comments

[Jonathan]

We are only such a constant in our children's lives so far because this is the first few months - and the attachments being formed are very, very important. They need to know we will always be there - and the easiest way to reinforce that (to begin with) is to do just that - be there.

My going back to work will be their first real experience of our not *always* being there - and their first real sight of growing up in their new family.

Your blog is great btw.