Mer-boy Punches His Friend in the Mouth (can't imagine why)

This whole frontal lobe testosterone thing is about to kill me.

I understand the psychology behind what happened. Dog bite, frustration, pecking order, emotions unable to control...but I have never laid a hand on my child in his life. We don't use physical violence as an acceptable form of communicating feelings...(until now I guess)

In discussing, because that's what we DO, Achilles biting Mer, the truth came out he was (get this) blowing in the dogs ear. Apparently something Mer has done on and off since we rescued her, because he thinks it's funny how she turns around and...well, you know how dogs are when you blow in their ear. THEY DON'T LIKE IT.

Achilles finally got (please pardon the pun here, it's early) "An ear-full" and told him, the only way she knew how to knock it the Hell off. I hope he got the message, because she could've ripped his face off.

It's like having a younger sibling, not the face-ripping part, he's partly jealous of the time Achilles is with me (sigh), and partly the amount of...RESPONSIBILITIES having a dog entails. When Mer wants to play a video game, Achilles wants his attention NOW. If she doesn't get it, she finds something of his and chews it up.

Can you say "Bakugan", ipod Ear buds, and sundry items at her disposal?

Achilles is just being Achilles. She's a Rat Terrier...what the Hell do you expect? All she wants to do is fly. She runs like a rabbit, can catch wild cats, squirrels, and one opossum who gave her a nasty bite.
Then she'll lay in your lap with her eyes closed as you rub her belly.

Achilles is a good dog...as long as you don't blow in her ear.

Mer is growing at the speed of light. A toddler I knew, a Kindergartner I knew, all through the last almost eleven years I KNEW. Now I have a pre-teen who wants me, but doesn't...and I'm out of my parenting territory.

Part of me wants to "High Five"  him for sticking up for himself with the kid he slugged. He's angry he's small, he's scared he's going to die, he's pissed at his father, he's furious we don't have a new car, we lost our big home, that I treat him like a baby half the time, it just goes on.

I'm going with the frontal lobe-testosterone theory.

I love this child with all my being and then some, but I must allow him the right to be angry at me.

The best thing I can do now is help Mer find appropriate outlets to express his anger, which I'm trying to do.

He is so creative it's mind boggling, so intelligent it scares me I cannot keep up.

But the anger...

It's part of the process.

Comments

[Stef]

If we do our job as parents right, then sometimes, our child(ren) will be angry with us. And I agree it's hard to do, but it's worse if you are your child's pal instead of his parent. That just gives permission to run riot over their parent(s) because there are no boundries. You can be your child's pal AFTER they're grown. Until then, you're the boss.

[Apostol Apostolopoulos]

Chelsea~ There's a reason I love you girl! Parenthood's a bitch man : )
Be well sister!

[Chelsea]

"I love this child with all my being and then some, but I must allow him the right to be angry at me."

Yes. I'm sure that's a terribly hard thing to do, but so important. I wish more people could do it.